The Boldest Thing I’ve Ever Done: My kids


I was once asked what the boldest thing I’ve ever done in my life was. At the time I wasn’t sure.

Up until today, I’d say it was a decision in 1998 to alter my domestic life. I broke up my family of four. Without delving into the sorted details, I took the kids – she took the house.

One of my biggest concerns over the years as a Single-Dad raising two boys was how they would be affected.  How they’d adjust. Yes, often the concern was how to feed, clothe them and how to keep the power on.

Today my oldest son Austin walks the stage and receives his High School diploma. A monumental moment because it marks the end of his basic training and the beginning of his advanced learning as a young man…more or less on his own.

It’s a proud day for all parents on graduation day but here’s a BIG verbal “high-five” for single parents that have sacrificed, scraped and succeeded to manage a life, career and household on their own. Fortunately, for every single parent there’s often a network of close,  understanding friends, Aunts, Uncles and Grandparents that make the road less bumpy.

The tears rolling down my face today are from the guilt of not being able to provide more over the years and for the things I still feel I need to teach him. At the same time my tears are from the pride and joy I feel for how remarkable my son has turned out without a lot of “those” things. He’s a fine young man. He melts me.

To borrow from the cheesy but true line from Sandra Bullock’s “The Blind Side” I hope we all relate as parents…I didn’t change their life. They changed mine.

My children are the boldest thing I’ve ever done.

Congrats Austin. Thank you for making my life so rich and my job raising you as easy as you have.

You’re going to be just fine.




DREAM MEANING: I woke up this morning…


I’m standing on a credenza with a tall bookshelf chocked full of books and knick knacks. I’m handing my Grandpa Coffey (deceased since 1990) items from the shelf as if we were cleaning or packing them away.

One of the items I pick up is a wooden homemade contraption about the length of a ruler but slightly “L” shaped –  could’ve been a crude back scratcher or some other kind of utility tool for Lord knows what (he was handy like that).

On the backside handle of this “tool” was a landscape picture showing a scene from one of our family camping trips we used to go on. Grandpa sometimes joined us. He also lived with us for long stretches of time when I was growing up. The picture showed my entire family as if someone had taken the picture from a few sites down from us, complete with our dog, tent, a lake….

I begin crying in my dream.

I woke up. No tears, but curious why this scene and imagery has appeared at this time in my life? Yes, I could tie more than a few current events to the obvious messages; significance of loved ones, family, special moments and token knick knacks.

Everytime I think of the dream now I get emotional.